Find help for —
Relationships
When the same argument keeps arriving in different clothes.
Therapy for relationship patterns, in Bristol and online. This is individual work — you do not need to bring anyone with you.
First call
Free · 15 minutes
Sessions
50 minutes, weekly
Fee
£85
Format
In person or online
01 — What this can look like
Not a diagnosis
Most people recognise three or four of these.
The pattern is usually older than the relationship it is currently showing up in.
You rehearse conversations before having them.
You know the argument’s shape before it starts.
You keep choosing people who need managing.
You apologise to end things, not because you agree.
You are careful in a way that is exhausting.
Being fine alone feels safer than trying again.
You are allowed to want it to be easier.
03 — How we work with it
Three ways in, depending on where the pattern started.
You don’t need to know which one you want. Working that out is part of the first conversation.
Attachment-Informed
When the pattern predates the person
We look at what you learned early about closeness and what it costs, and where that is still running without anyone asking it to.
Cognitive Behavioural
When the same argument repeats
We slow one recurring exchange right down and find the point where it turns — which is rarely where it looks like it turns.
Compassion-Focused
When you are always the one who adjusts
For people who keep the peace at their own expense. We look at what you expect would happen if you stopped.
04 — How I work
Four principles
The first session is mostly listening.
Nothing is decided in advance, and you can stop after any point. This is the shape it usually takes.
01
The free call
Fifteen minutes to say what is happening in your own words. No notes are taken and nothing follows unless you want it to.
Phone or video
02
Session one
We take one relationship and trace one pattern through it, rather than covering everything.
50 minutes
03
Weeks two to six
We work on your half of the exchange. That is the only half you can change, and it is usually enough to move the rest.
Usually weekly
04
Reviewing it
Around session six we look honestly at whether this is helping, and decide together what happens next.
Openly, not by default
First call
Free · 15 minutes
Session
50 minutes
Fee
£85
05 — Questions about anxiety
Before the first call
Things people ask me about anxiety
If yours isn’t here, just ask me on the call.
06 — Related reading
From the journal
